How much money should I be saving?

Planning to save “whatever is left” at the end of each month is really no plan at all. It’s amazing how easy it is to spend every dollar that comes in and there never seems to be any left for savings. Savings has to be an integral part of your financial plan or you will always put it off for tomorrow. So just how much should you be saving?
In addition to setting up an emergency savings fund and maxing out your retirement plans such as your 401(k) or IRA, a good goal is to save at least 10% of your income. This should be built into your monthly budget and can increase as your income grows.

How much house can I afford?

It’s important to note that how much house you can afford is oftentimes very different than how much money the bank will loan you. Although lending standards have tightened considerably in recent years, it’s still possible to get home loans for more than you can realistically afford.

If you are looking to buy a house a good rule of thumb is to not spend more than 3x your annual income. So if you earn $50,000 per year, then you should be able to afford a $150,000 house. If you have zero debt outside of your mortgage, then you can generally use 4x your annual income.

Another way to look, that financial advisors often look at this, is that your housing costs (including principle, interest, property taxes, insurance and utilities) should represent 28-36% of your monthly income.

How much should I have saved for retirement?

This is a very smart question to be asking, because the prudent man forseeth the evil and hideth himself (Proverbs 27:12). Yet 54% of Americans have never calculated how much they will need for retirement.

There are several other factors that come into play, but a good rule of thumb is for your retirement portfolio to be worth 25x the amount you anticipate living off each year. So if you plan to live off of $50,000 per year in retirement, your retirement portfolio should be $1,250,000 (or 25 x $50,000).

It’s also important to be realistic about how much you will spend during retirement. For the most part your expenses will remain the same or even higher. So don’t assume that you can live on $25,000 per year in retirement, if you are used to living on $50,000 now.
How much debt should I have?

The ideal answer is probably zero, but the realities of life dictate otherwise. Experts recommend that your total long-term debt payments (e.g. mortgage, car payments, credit cards and loan payments) should not exceed 36% of your gross income. Although many people carry higher debt-to-income ratios than this, once you go above 36% your credit score will be impacted.

How much life insurance should I have?

If you’re married, and particularly if you have children, you definitely need to have life insurance. The question is – how much life insurance do I need? There is no hard-and-fast rule that gives you this answer, but a good rule of thumb is 6x – 10x your family income.

Sticking with our example of a family that earns $50,000 per year, they should purchase a minimum of $300,000 in life insurance coverage and ideally purchase at least $500,000. Of course this number will be impacted by many factors such as how old your children are, how much debt you currently have, etc.

She wrote:

My personal experiences working in the music department: I was not only the band director, but I played the piano and led song services in our local assembly – but also in other assemblies during a convention or a fellowship meeting.

I had a wonderful instructor in music. Her name was Ruth Weatherington. Her words spoken to me were words of wisdom. She said the piano player was not important but the position I held was important. The piano keys were not to be played hard but treated gently as any instrument would. I was taught never to approach a service with a carnal mind. The most important thing was to exalt Christ – not myself.

Be cheerful while sitting at the piano. Have a spirit of humility; not a proud spirit. Be approachable; not arrogant. Be willing to share your knowledge of how to build a song service with others. Be willing to share the piano with others.

Be patient with other piano players. Listen to suggestions. Pray about the suggestions even if they are never used.

While playing the piano never try to display self by adding extra notes. (This goes for those who play instruments in the band too.)

Personally, I tried to display Christ in my playing and singing as I was taught by my teacher – Ruth Weatherington.

Marriages in the body of Christ should be the best, the most godly, the most biblical marriages on earth. In prior articles, we have investigated the fact that God gave marriage to make us holy, and that love is a decision and not an emotion. Then we began addressing various aspects of a Christian marriage one at a time, covering the need for respect, for prayer, and for perseverance. Proceeding, this article will discuss the need for struggles and hardships. Yes, the need for them. They are part of the very fabric of every good marriage.

If you cut open a cocoon, the butterfly that emerges will never fly. If you help open the eggshell, the chick that emerges will be weak, and will die. The butterfly must struggle to get out of the cocoon. The chick must struggle to break out of the eggshell. Those animals need that struggle to grow strong and viable. It is God’s plan.

Is struggling also a part of God’s plan for His people so they can grow spiritually strong? Should our life be easy? What spiritual opportunities are hidden in our difficulties? Does a life of comfort produce Christian maturity?

What about married life? Should that part of life always be easy? Is there any spiritual benefit to be gained from the tough times, the uncomfortable seasons, and the marital struggles that everyone eventually encounters? In II Corinthians 4:17, Paul calls his sufferings just a light affliction – but an affliction nonetheless. And remember, this man was beaten with rods and with whips, he was stoned and left for dead, he suffered innumerable hardships, but he considered them a light affliction, and knew they were necessary to produce something very valuable.

It seems that marriage is much the same way. Fairy-tale lives are not true. Hollywood movie endings present a false concept. Nobody lives happily ever after. There are tough days and difficult times in every marriage; every single one. But they are part of the refining process; turning raw material into fine gold. Illnesses, financial struggles, family problems, and such are necessary to build the kind of relationship between a husband and a wife that can display the glory of God to the world.

A real, Christian marriage can show the world the redemptive love, the godly patience and the abiding love of God in a very real way. Learning to love and appreciate your spouse, once you realize he or she is not the person you thought they were when dating, is a difficult endeavor. Everyone who is dating has an image in their mind of who the other person is. But reality never matches perception. Marriage is learning who your partner is, and then learning to accept, respect and even love that person. That is sometimes a struggle.

Financial difficulty is a typical part of the struggle. So is child-rearing. Sometimes one marital partner has health issues; sometimes both do. Some of life’s dreams vaporize in the dazzling light of reality. Bickering, arguments, jealousy, different goals, different beliefs, different hobbies and recreation, and different circles of friends can all create hardships. But good marriages are the ones that endure hardships.

A good marriage is not something you find; it is something you build. It is something you must work for. It takes effort – struggle. It is hard work. But so is running in a marathon; yet the reward motivates some people to work hard in order to be prepared to run in that race. For them, it pays off. The struggle makes the man or the woman. So does the struggle make the marriage.

David could not have been as great a king if he had not been hated, mistreated, and persecuted by King Saul. Rejection by man drove Jeremiah closer to God. Paul’s constant rebuffing by his own countrymen made him the apostle to the Gentiles. Every hero of the faith was made and shaped by their struggles. Our faith not only is seen through our struggles, it is formed and refined by them.

Do not run from the struggles of marital life. Gain from them. Let them mature you in Christ and drive you closer to the Lord. When you just cannot communicate with your spouse, talk to the Lord. When keeping your promise is difficult, bear your cross. Let the periodic discord in the marriage be the exercise program that strengthens your spiritual muscles. Endure hardness as a good soldier of the cross. II Timothy 2:3.

This attribute relates closely with the previous one about endurance. Actually, all of the attributes of a Christian marriage are interrelated. To endure implies that there are hardships to be endured. But my focus in this point is not the endurance, but the struggle. Marriages become strong because of the struggles to overcome challenges. Marital difficulties are, by definition, difficult. Married life is not easy; it isn’t supposed to be easy.

Hard times are hard. The death of a child, for instance, can either wreck, or it can strengthen, a marriage. But it will be a difficult time either way. Marriages are either strengthened or weakened by severe financial distress, debilitating sickness, or some foolish and immature act. It is how you respond that matters.

Struggles are good for you. Financial trouble can and should draw a couple closer together. Young people should not expect to start out with just as nice a house, just as nice a car, just as nice furniture, as their parents have. It took those parents 20-30 years to achieve that financial status, and they had to scrimp and save at times. Young married couples sometimes think they should start there, and go too far in debt, and get frustrated in their attempt to have it all. But there is something good and valuable in having to do without, to have to count the cost before going to the grocery store, to saving a dollar here, and having to wish you could afford that vacation.

The race for a happy marriage is a marathon and not a sprint. You have to keep running over the long haul. It is that way with the entire Christian experience; marriage is a part of that for most people. Paul said in I Corinthians 9:24 that you must run, that you may win the prize. And Hebrews 12:1 admonishes us to run with patience, but run.

Try to look at your hardships in a different light. View them as blessed experiences. They were carefully handcrafted for you by God, and filtered through His heart of love, before they reached you. You must need them, or He wouldn’t have given them to you. Look back on your life, especially your life as a follower of the Lord. Have there been any benefits to prior difficulties? Did God bring you through them? Then He will bring you through your marital struggles and hard times as well.

Solomon’s wise words have been repeated millions of times, but sadly few actually take them to heart. Last year, the Employee Benefit Research Institute (EBRI) released their 20th annual Retirement Confidence Survey and the results were shocking.

An astounding 31% of currently employed workers have not even started to save for their retirement. That means that nearly 1 in 3 workers in this country have not saved a single dollar for their retirement. Yet a significant percentage of these people still feel confident that they will have enough money to retire on.

Almost everyone hopes to be able to enjoy retirement some day. Sure it may seem like a long way off for some of us, but it is still a real expectation. However, few people understand how much money they actually need to save in order to fund their retirement. In fact, 54% of Americans have never even calculated how much money they will need in retirement.

Recognizing the cost of retirement can be an eye opening experience. It’s never too early to start saving for retirement, but it is possible to wait too late before starting. To help you in achieving your retirement goals here are some savings strategies for you to use regardless of your age.

Teenage Years

Few teenagers are actually thinking about retirement savings or saving for anything for that matter. However, if you were to save $100 each month beginning at age 18, you would have accumulated over $1.3 million at a 10% annual return by the time you reach 65. If you had waited until you were 40 to start saving $100 per month, you would only have $135,000 saved up by the time you reached 65. Instead of saving $100 each month, you would need to save $1,000 to reach the same goal of $1.3 million by age 65.

The longer you put off saving, the more money you will need to contribute to make up the difference.

Roaring 20’s

By the time most people reach their 20’s, they are already saddled with student loans, car loans, credit card debt, etc. On top of all that, they are looking to get married and buy a house, furniture, a second car, etc. There hardly seems to be enough money to cover the monthly bills, much less set aside money for retirement.

This is also the time that most people get their first real job. Implementing a regular savings plan by setting aside a portion of each paycheck is an important pattern to start early on. Ideally, you will begin to set aside 10-12% of your income towards retirement savings. Oftentimes your employer will help you with this by providing matching contributions into a 401(k) plan.

Terrible 30’s

Upon reaching their 30’s, many people are focused on spending money to upgrade their lifestyle. A bigger house, nicer car and the latest electronic gadgets suddenly become must-have items. That’s on top of the surprisingly high cost of raising children! It’s no surprise then that so many individuals forget about saving for retirement.

Hopefully, you have already established a pattern of saving 10-12% of your income by this time. With 30-40 years of compounding interest ahead, it’s important not to be tempted into cutting back now.

Fabulous 40’s

Unfortunately, most people don’t start getting serious about retirement savings until they enter their 40’s. By this time they have already missed out on 20 years worth of savings. They can still catch up, but it’s going to require a strict financial commitment (and much larger contributions to their savings account).

If you have been saving regularly for the past 20 years, then you are able to enjoy the benefits of your earlier savings strategy. You should already be able to see a nice nest egg taking shape.

Fantastic 50’s

Many people begin to panic when they reach their 50’s, because they realize just how little they have saved for retirement. A recent Wells Fargo report found that the median retirement savings was only $29,000 for people in the 50-59 age brackets. Sure these people are making more money that ever before, but it’s hard to begin an aggressive savings strategy at this point in your life.

Hopefully, by the time you reach your 50’s you are contributing the max amount to your 401(k) or IRA each year. Now that your retirement years are on the horizon, it’s time to shift your portfolio to safer investment options. You’ll want to protect that nest egg that you’ve worked so hard to accumulate. You should also be working diligently towards having all your debts paid off by the time you retire (house, car, credit cards, etc.).

Swinging 60’s

By the time you reach your 60’s, you have probably commenced your retirement countdown. If you have been particularly good at saving, you may even be contemplating early retirement. By this stage in your life the vast majority of your investments should be in conservative holdings as you can’t afford to have your 401(k) cut in half by a market crash.

The most effective retirement savings strategies are those that start when you are young. Consistently saving 10-12% of your income will enable you to face your golden years without having to worry about your finances. Remember it never is too early to start saving, but if you delay it can eventually become too late.

God is setting the global stage for end-time events. The prophecies of the Bible pertaining to the end of Gentile times, the Great Tribulation, the Battle of Armageddon, and the establishment of the Millennial Kingdom of Jesus Christ, will come to pass. But before God opens the curtain on these dramatic events, He first must prepare the world stage.

As watchmen, as men with an understanding of the times, we are prayerfully observing God’s work in the body of Christ, in the body of the beast, in the body of Moses, and in the body of Mohammed. We’ve seen great healing in the body of Christ. Can anyone seriously doubt that God is working? What about the body of Moses? The return of God’s chosen people to the Promised Land is a fulfillment of prophecy and a necessary predicate to other end-time events. Surely, God is working there.

Then there is the body of the beast, human governments. Are we aware of the great changes that have occurred? Imperialism died early in the Twentieth Century. Communism essentially died as the Twentieth Century ended. Democracy was expected to flourish, but routinely fails in the face of extremism and despotism. Pure capitalism is held in low esteem, with governments rushing to supply what many perceive capitalism fails to provide. Nationalism has declined since World War II, being replaced by multinational coalitions and associations based on religion, race or other common interests. The new world order that is emerging is not based on patriotic national interests.

And in the Middle East, ruthless leaders are being overthrown by revolutions. Time will tell whether these forces produce better or worse results. Some revolutions are beneficial, like the American Revolutionary War. Others lead the people into even worse conditions, like the Russian Bolshevik Revolution of 1917 or the overthrow of the Shah of Iran. Some of the radical Islamic factions now seeking power in these Arab states advocate the re-establishment of a multinational caliphate – uniting the strong currents of multi-nationalism and aggressive religion.

There is an increasing conflict between Christianity and Islam. Both are missionary religions that seek to grow through conversion. Both believe that only their faith is correct and that others are infidels. Both seek to mold their society according to their values and beliefs. Further conflict, violent conflict, is inevitable. Powerful forces are at work.

As our world changes, and likely changes for the worse, the only safe place to be is in the body of Christ. Psalm 91 will become more precious to God’s people, with its promise of protection for the righteous. This is no time to get worldly, or to become lukewarm in your service to God and His people. If anything, the acceleration of preparation for the future we have been taught about should inspire us to re-double our efforts, and to ramp-up our zeal. Let’s be busy about our Father’s business.

Not Tithing

While some people feel that they can’t afford to tithe, the reality is that you can’t afford not to tithe. Tithing is an obligation that is clearly laid out in the scriptures. Individuals that choose to spend their tithes on themselves rarely ever find themselves prospering financially. Yet God has promised to pour out blessings on those that following this one Biblical principle.

Only Making Minimum Payments

According to CreditCards.com, 1 out of 6 families only make the minimum payment on their credit cards each month. While the average credit card debt has dipped below $5,000 for the first time since 2002, it still stands at a whopping $4,951. Making only the minimum payment on a balance this large will result in thousands of dollars lost in interest payments that could have gone towards your retirement savings. Even worse is that most individuals continue to use and/or misuse their credit cards and so the overall balance just keeps climbing higher. Not only does this lead to wasting tremendous amounts of money on interest, but it also never lets individuals get off the credit treadmill.

Making Late Payments

If you’re late in paying your utility bills you will likely have to pay a nominal late fee of a couple of dollars. However, if you are late on your mortgage or credit card payments the cost is much more significant. The average credit card late fee is now $28. A history of late payments not only will result in significant fees, but will generally trigger higher interest rates and will certainly damage your credit score. This damaging behavior will result in future purchases costing you much more than they should because of your bad credit history.

Living Above Your Means

The most basic fundamental of personal finance is that you can’t spend more than you earn. Those that do are forced to rely on credit to make up the difference. People that consistently use credit to spend more than they can afford are just piling up more debt than they can ever afford to pay back. Young people are particularly susceptible to using credit to fund their lifestyle, without realizing the tremendous burden that debt will create later in life.

Not Maxing Out Your 401(k) Contributions

Turning down free money seems like an obvious financial mistake and yet many people do it every day. According to Fidelity, 80% of companies with 401(k) plans offer matching contributions as a benefit to their employees. If you are failing to contribute enough to your company’s 401(k) program to receive your company’s matching funds, then you are in effect turning down free money. As you near retirement age this will be a decision you will really regret.

Draining Your 401(k)

Just contributing to your 401(k) program is not enough, you also have to avoid the temptation to withdraw that money. A study by Hewitt Associates showed that nearly 50% of all employee’s cash out of their 401(k) when they switch jobs. This results in them having to pay taxes on the amount of the withdrawal as well as a 10% penalty if they are under 59 ½ years old. More importantly this financial mistake will result in having significantly less money available for retirement.

Relying On Social Security

Depending on who you listen to, Social Security may or may not be around by the time you retire. Budget projections show that the system is going to be drained by retiring baby boomers and longer life spans sometime in the next 20-40 years. While it seems unfathomable for our government to allow Social Security to go completely broke, there is a strong likelihood that benefits will be reduced. Relying only on social security to fund your retirement is a financial mistake you are sure to regret.

Always Leasing, Never Owning

Our consumerist society has wholeheartedly embraced the concept of leasing versus owning. We lease cars, houses and even furniture. This reflects both a lack of responsibility and a lust to always have new things. After years of paying for the privilege of borrowing these items, we have to give them right back. While leasing makes sense in some circumstances, in most cases you will end up regretting wasting all that money over the years and not having anything of value to show for it.

Buying the Latest Gadgets

The tendency to rush out and buy the latest gadgets is another financial mistake that you could easily avoid. Simply exercising patience and denying yourself instant gratification can result in tremendous savings. For example, people that rushed to buy the Apple iPhone when it was first released in 2007 paid $399, while those that waited just a few months later could purchase the same iPhone for only $199.

Buying More Than You Need

You might say that our eyes are bigger than our wallets, but Americans have a tendency to buy things that are bigger and nicer than we really need. Middle-class families are convinced that they need to drive a luxury car and live in a mini-mansion stocked with the biggest and best of everything. Buying big ticket items that you don’t need just because it was on sale or had special financing offered it almost never a good idea.

Having Inadequate Insurance

Approximately 1.5 million Americans file for bankruptcy each year. You might be surprised to know that nearly 60% of these bankruptcies are due to exorbitant medical bills. Even the healthiest individuals are at risk for developing a chronic illness or need an emergency medical procedure. Without insurance you could end up saddled with tens of thousands in debt. Not having health, homeowners, auto or life insurance or having inadequate insurance coverage is a major financial mistake that you are almost certain to regret.

Not Teaching Your Children Financial Responsibility

In their chase for a life of luxury, many parents are presenting a poor example to their children. It is our duty as parents to teach our children financial responsibility. That buying everything you want without regard to if you can afford it is a path that leads to financial ruin.

The idea of seven dispensations is controversial. Many claim there are only two – law and grace, corresponding to the Old Testament and the New Testament. But did the age of law exist before Mount Sinai? Were the Ten Commandments already known and in force before God wrote them on tables of stone? What about laws dealing with adultery, treatment of slaves, and the necessity of a priesthood? Did all the ceremonial laws and moral laws apply in the years before Moses? Is there law in the New Testament era? Was there grace in the Old Testament era? Really, any division of man’s rule raises some issues and questions. But consider if God gave man seven grand dispensations.

These seven eras explain distinct ways that God has dealt with man. Even when given every advantage, time has proven that man cannot deal with the devil, and cannot fulfill the Dominion Mandate of Genesis one. All seven dispensations are devoted to showing man and angels that there is no peace, justice or security without God. Each of the seven ends in judgment, yet each also ends with hope.

These seven distinct ages cover the entire gamut of human history. They start and end in paradise, but O what a difference between the beginning and the end of this matter. Human history begins with Paradise Lost; it ends with Paradise Restored.

The seven ages are:

1. The Age of Innocence
2. The Age of Conscience
3. The Age of Human Government
4. The Age of Promise
5. The Mosaic Law
6. The Dispensation of Grace
7. The Millennial Reign of Christ and the Redeemed

It might be good for us to see the working of God in these dispensations. But this is no mere academic exercise. The point is to see that we cannot make it on our own. We all need the Lord. Sin is so powerful that it cannot be resisted or overcome in our own lives or in the world without the salvation of our Lord Jesus Christ.

The First Dispensation – The Age of Innocence

The Dispensation of Innocence showed that mankind was unable to serve God even without a fallen nature. This period extends from the creation of Adam and Eve until sin and the curse ended it (the Fall.) Although we do not know how long Adam and Eve were in Eden, we assume this was a short dispensation. During this era, God did not make many demands on the couple. He told them to take care of Eden, to guard and defend it, and not to eat from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. This dispensation is covered by Genesis 1:26-3:24.

Sometimes we blame our fallen, sinful nature for all our problems. If we only were free of that downward pull in our minds and emotions. . . we think somehow we wouldn’t sin. We sometimes excuse our failings because that is just the way we are. We blame genetics, or circumstances, or something and say we sin because we were born sinners. If only we didn’t have this family trait of a quick temper, or if only we weren’t so susceptible to jealousy, or whatever. And it is somewhat true. It would seem logical that resisting temptation would be easier if we didn’t have this sinful nature in us. But the Dispensation of Innocence proved that, even without the fallen nature, we cannot live in paradise.

The third chapter Genesis is a major transition. It is more than just the change from the first to the second dispensation. It is the loss of innocence and the expulsion of mankind from the peace, security, painlessness and life of Eden. More importantly, it is a separation of man’s walk of fellowship with God.

In Genesis chapters one and two, we see Adam and Eve in innocence after their creation. They enjoyed total fellowship with God, as they walked and talked with Him daily in Eden. Now skip Chapter 3 for a moment and go to Chapter 4. Here the reader sees murder, lust, jealousy, lying, corruption, rebellion, and wickedness of all types. Something terrible happened to cause good to go bad, and what happened can be found in Chapter three. What happened is called sin. Every conceivable evil begins in the third chapter of Genesis with Satan.

We all know the story of Eve being tempted by Satan and how she succumbed to the temptation. Eve should not have taken Satan lightly, and we today should never take any temptation lightly. When we are presented with satanic temptation, it is a serious matter. We need an outside source of help. We need the Lord, His Word and His Spirit. Even if our spirit was pure and free of a sinful nature, we would still be susceptible to external temptation; so be prepared, and lean on heaven’s resources.

Mankind, then, was created in innocence. He was then placed in an ideal environment. There was no decay, no death, no weeds, no thorns or thistles. There was nothing in Eden that lived off of decay, because there was no death. There was not even rain or thunderstorms, because the ground was watered from a mist from below. So it was there, in the midst of beauty and perfection, that Adam and Eve were “planted”. Theirs was a simple test with a dire warning. Eve fell through pride. Adam fell through choice. The first dispensation came to an end with their expulsion from the Garden of Eden.

The Second Dispensation – The Age of Conscience

The Dispensation of Conscience demonstrated that mankind cannot restore paradise by following the dictates of his conscience. There are those today who believe that man is basically good; that he is born innocent; and that if there were just more fairness in life, things would be wonderful. People think we could eliminate crime if we eradicate poverty. These people tend to blame lack of education, failure to share the wealth, and circumstances for all the evil in the world. But man, guided solely by his own conscience, degenerates into unremitting evil.

The second dispensation spans time from the fall of man to the Flood, during which time God provided a means of atonement. Animals were permitted to be killed, and their blood was shed, so that Adam and Eve and their descendants, who were fallen human beings, could be reconciled to the Creator. This dispensation is covered by Genesis 4:1 – 8:19.

Through sin and the Fall, Adam and Eve gained a knowledge of good and evil. This created a conscience that, in theory, could be the basis for making right moral judgments. They transmitted that knowledge to their descendants, and thus the human race came under this responsibility – to do good and to eschew evil. During this era, there was no government and no law. The conscience of man was to direct him to do right. There were no kings, no judges, and no policemen. This age proved that the mind cannot, of its own volition, choose right over wrong. You cannot just let your conscience be your guide. Some say, “I don’t feel condemned, so there must not be anything wrong with it.” Your feelings and your conscience are not the proper measure of right and wrong. See Proverbs 14:12.

Still, a conscience is a good thing. Guilty consciences have moved many to confess their wrongs and change. A human conscience bolstered by the active operation of the Holy Ghost can be a guide to proper Christian conduct. Our good God has given us the gift and freedom of conscience. While the innocence of the Garden of Eden has been lost, the human conscience, though marred, retains some resemblance to the image of God. The Age of Conscience ended in the 8th chapter of Genesis, but still today, even in our sinful time, fallen man still has a conscience.

In the Age of Conscience, man was to obey God through the use of his conscience. There was no code of law, as the Law of Moses. God was a moral God; could man be a moral man? The answer, of course, was no. Genesis 6:5 says that the conscience (imagination of heart) of man was only evil. Instead of maintaining righteousness through conscience, verses 11-12 show that mankind became corrupt.

Genesis, chapters 7 – 9, show the transition between the dispensation of conscience and the beginning of the age of human government. During the dispensation of conscience, man in general is aware of right and wrong, but all of the land is consumed with sin. Young and old were using their consciences to make increasingly evil choices. Because of rampant evil, God had to judge the earth and everything in it by a world-wide flood.

Each of the seven dispensations will end in judgment. Each shows that man is insufficient to live up to good, godly principles on his own. These dispensations are a display to mankind and to the angelic host the greatness of our God. Man, for all his smug superiority, cannot do right consistently. He needs divine assistance. He needs the blood of Christ, applied to his heart through the Holy Spirit, to reach the ideal.

When the waters of the Flood receded, the ark settled on a mountain peak, and God opened the door. Noah, his family, and the animals left the ark. What a sight that must have been. Also God made a covenant with Noah, and that covenant remains with humankind to this day – the earth will never again be destroyed by a flood, and the sign of the covenant was a rainbow. God’s covenant with Noah is recorded in Genesis 9:8-17. After the Flood, the human race showed its propensity to evil again. Despite knowledge and a conscience, mankind focused on evil.

The Third Dispensation – The Era of Human Government

The Age of Human Government covers that time period from God’s covenant with Noah to the call of Abraham. God’s covenant with Noah after the Flood established human government. Government was given the right to enforce such laws as capital punishment for premeditated murder. God had purified the earth of great evil and now gave man ample power to govern it. At this point we are only in the eighth chapter of the Book of Genesis, but already in the third dispensation. We don’t have a lot recorded in the Scriptures about the first four dispensations; but we do have that which is relevant to us in our day. That is the point we are trying to make in this series, and that is the lesson we are trying to receive. What do we learn from each dispensation of man? We learn that there is no peace, no contentment, no justice, no lifting of the curse, without a relationship with God through His Son, Jesus.

It has been argued that mankind will be good if it is forced to be good. Policemen, judges, courthouses and prisons will enforce righteous conduct. Some think that if we just pass enough laws, we can create a just society. So God gave mankind governmental powers. But the result was not justice and righteousness. Sadly, the dispensation of human government failed as other dispensations had failed. It resulted in a Tower of Babel on the Plains of Shinar, and man attempting to be independent of God. It ended in the confusion of tongues. This dispensation is covered by Genesis 8:20-11:32.

God gave Noah some of the principles for this new dispensation. This era provided for the institution of human government. It is seen in the provision for capital punishment for premeditated murder. This is seen in Genesis 9:6: “Whosoever sheddeth man’s blood, by man shall his blood be shed.” Remember that when Cain killed Abel, God dealt directly with Cain and did not kill him. There was no death penalty and no human government established to enforce law. In fact, God would not allow human punishment on Cain, setting a mark on him as a warning against such human judgment. But, in this dispensation, God provides for human government to punish crime.

God’s command gave humans the right to enforce the law. It allowed for kings and governors and judges and police. Crimes could be punished and murderers could even be executed. Surely this would keep evil in check and allow righteousness to flourish. But it failed and was soon corrupted by man. The age of human government started with the family of Noah walking out to see a world that had been renovated by the Flood. Wicked and vile men had been destroyed. Noah was a preacher of righteousness; a man of faith. This was a chance to establish a new order; a godly society. But, this era, too, was a failure.

It was during this time that men banded together and formed the first city-states. They also decided to build a tower. Genesis 11:4 says the tower they envisioned was to reach heaven. This “angered” God. Whatever their reason for building the tower, they were in direct disobedience to what God had told them to do. Man’s responsibility and test during the third dispensation was to obey God through the use of his conscience and human government. He failed again. The judgment? Confusion of language and scattering of the people.

The story of Abram, known as Abraham, the son of Terah, in the line from Shem, a son of Noah, is relevant to the closing of this dispensation. This genealogical line from Noah to Abram and beyond will lead ultimately to the Messiah, the Lord Jesus Christ.

We have now surveyed 2000 years of biblical history, and three dispensations, ending with Chapter 11 of Genesis. In these eleven chapters we have seen the Creation, the Fall of Man, Cain and Abel, Noah and The Flood, and the Tower of Babel. The story has been focused on great world events. From this point forward, we will focus more on God dealing with the lives of men. We are now nearing the end of the third dispensation and the beginning of the fourth dispensation which will open with Abraham. Abraham is very important for many reasons, one of which is that he is the bridge between these two dispensations.

Even Abram, up to the time of God’s call, lived in idolatry, Joshua 24:2, but not in poverty. Archaeology has established that Ur of the Chaldees, from which Abraham came, was a very wealthy civilization. He left the good life behind to obey God. This became a pattern for many who would follow in his footsteps. Many champions of faith have passed up a good, easy life, choosing rather to suffer afflictions with the people of God than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season.

The end of this dispensation of government was a dark time. True religion was almost extinct. The lamp of the Lord almost went out. God had to reveal Himself in a special revelation to an idolater in order to establish the next move, the next dispensation. It seems that God often intervenes in human affairs to shine His light just when things seem the darkest.

The Dispensation of Human Government failed and closed. Dispensation three ran from the Covenant made with Noah to the call of Abraham. Dispensation four, in the next issue of this magazine, will cover the time period continuing from Abraham to the Exodus.

The Fourth Dispensation – The Age of Promise

Some philosopher may pose the question: What is the incentive to do right? Government did not enforce righteousness. Rather, it became corrupt and despotic. Maybe the promise of great reward would prompt man to achieve a righteous, utopian society. So the fourth dispensation was the Dispensation of Promise.

After the people dispersed from the city of Babel, God called just one man, Abram. In Isaiah 51:2, God said He called Abraham alone. He entered into a covenant with one man, in order to bless the whole world. The promises of that covenant continue until today and will never be revoked. Some of those promises were unconditional. Others were conditioned on obedience. It was the violation of these conditions that resulted in Egyptian captivity and the ending of this dispensation. But it was these promises that cause the fourth dispensation to be called the Age of Promise. From this point in history, God would deal in a special way with one man, Abraham; one family, Abraham’s family; and one nation, the nation that would come from Abraham. Even in our dispensation, we are also spiritually the seed of Abraham.

Some people believe if the goal is worthy, people will all be good. If they could just see the benefits of prosperity, then there would be no stealing, no graft or corruption, no evil. So in this age, God gave a chosen people special promises of great blessings. If they could have lived up to the conditions, they would have had a utopia. But this dispensation also failed to bring the desired, post-millennial-style kingdom.

The third dispensation had ended on the Plain of Shinar when God confounded the language of the people and forced them to scatter. The fourth dispensation continued from Abraham until Moses received the Law on Mount Sinai.

Scripture for this dispensation is Genesis 12 through Exodus 18. It covers the lives of the Patriarchs. The primary persons God dealt with in this dispensation were Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Joseph. Of course, Moses is a transitional figure between the fourth and fifth dispensations. This Age of Promise takes us beyond the end of the book of Genesis.

In this era, God made great promises to Abraham: he would be the father of many nations, he would have the land of Canaan as an everlasting possession, in him all nations would be blessed, etc. These promises were reiterated to Isaac and Jacob and the 12 tribes of Israel. But the record of Genesis is lies, deceit, treachery and trickery.

The Dispensation of Promise ended with the Children of Israel serving as slaves in Egypt. Exodus 1:8; 11-14. They could say, “Where are the promised blessings?” But they had forfeited those blessings through their sins. They did not embrace the promises; they did not believe them. And they did not live up to the conditions imposed upon them. Abraham failed to believe God would give him a child through Sarah. He lied to kings instead of trusting God. Isaac failed by favoring Esau, when God had said He would bless Jacob. Isaac also lied to kings. Jacob’s failures were too numerous to list, as were the sins of his sons. Their descendants failed to believe God, even as He was delivering them from Egyptian bondage.

This dispensation, too, failed to bring the promised time of peace and blessing. It ended in judgment – like every dispensation. But please note that every dispensation also ends with a faint hope or promise of a better future. See Exodus 3:9-10.

The Fifth Dispensation –The Era of Law

In the first three dispensations, God dealt with mankind generally. In the fourth, He dealt with a called-out people: Abraham and his descendants. But promises to a special people were not enough. They needed more to attain to the righteousness that would bring a godly paradise to the earth. So God gave them something more: His law.

In the third dispensation, God had allowed mankind to form governments and establish laws to regulate conduct. But the governments quickly became tyrannical and oppressive, and the laws were unjust and unrighteous. So in this dispensation, the laws came from God Himself. If mankind failed, the fault could not be blamed on the Law.

In the dispensation of law, God gave detailed instructions about how to live, how to structure society, and how to live justly and righteously as a nation. The people said this was good; they could implement these laws and create an upright society. They said in Exodus 19:8, “All the Lord has spoken we will do.”

At Mount Sinai, the Israelites encamped, and Moses went up to the mountain to hear the Word of the Lord. For them, that Word is the law. This is not just the Ten Commandments written by the finger of God on tablets of stone, but the 613 moral and ceremonial laws contained in the books of Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy.

The Apostle Paul asked in Galatians 3:19: “Wherefore then serveth the law?” In other words, “Why did God give us the Law of Moses?” Verse 17 mentions that the law was given 430 years after the covenant with Abraham. And Abraham lived approximately 2000 years after Adam. Why was this Mosaic Law given? I understand there to be five basic reasons for the dispensation of the Mosaic Law: 1) to magnify God’s holiness; 2) to reveal man’s sinfulness; 3) to teach the Israelites how to live in a moral society; 4) to show the Israelites their need for a Savior; and, 5) to demonstrate God’s grace and mercy.

Many scriptures could be cited in support of these points, if space allowed. The point is that man could not live up to the principles of the good law of God. Therefore, the blessings of Deuteronomy 28 never materialized. But at the end of this dispensation, Jesus came. He lived up to every precept of that law. He never sinned. But for Israel, the dispensation ended in judgment – the destruction of the nation and the temple in 70 A.D.

But each dispensation also ends with a hope of a better future. The Book of Hebrews is a monumental treatise, demonstrating the superiority of the dispensation of grace over the dispensation of law. The operative word in Hebrews is “better.” We have a better high priest, operating in a better holiest place, who offered better sacrifices, establishing a better covenant, based on better promises in a better testament.

The age of law was not the end of the plan of God. God, in His mercy, did not leave man without a remedy. He provided something better that would do what the law could not do. Hebrews 7:19 says that the law couldn’t do it, but God provided something better. And Romans 8:3 tells us that what the law couldn’t do, God sent His Son to do for us.

We are now in a dispensation of grace. God did not just show man his failure in these dispensations. Our God also provided grace for His people. He didn’t leave them in their sinful condition; He provided a remedy. The law showed, conclusively, than man cannot attain true holiness and righteousness. Grace provides a way to attain them – not through law-keeping per se, but by the Holy Spirit.

The Sixth Dispensation – The Era of Grace

The Dispensation of Grace is what we sometimes call the church age. It is highly relevant to us, because we live in this age. For the first five ages, we can only look back in history to see how God worked in the past. But in this age, we can see how God is working now. The sacrificial death of Jesus Christ on the cross introduced a dispensation of unmerited favor, called grace. Instead of requiring man to live righteously by keeping the law, the righteousness of Another, is imputed to undeserving men and women.

Perhaps the most pertinent scripture for this age is where Paul said: By grace we are saved through faith and not our works. Ephesians 2:8-9. Great and powerful are the verses in our Bible that pertain to the grace of God. For example, Romans 3:24 says we are freely justified by grace. Now, Colossians 1:21says we have perfect peace with God through Christ.

In this dispensation, we still have all the good things God has given in the past, plus more. We now have obedience according to conscience, restraint of evil by the Holy Spirit, government, great and precious promises, God’s moral law to lead us through progressive sanctification, and the addition a new one – grace. Our test is to obey God on the basis of the above gifts He has given. We do not have to wait till the end to know that this dispensation is failing its test. How are we failing the tests? All we have to do is watch, not only the daily news on television, but some of the vile programming. The church will not save the world.

During the waning days of the fifth dispensation, Christ came and shed His blood to make payment for the sin that entered the world during the first dispensation. Colossians 1:14; Romans 5:8-21. Once the price had been paid, we were commissioned to get the word out about salvation. This is called the Good News, or the Gospel, and is defined in I Corinthians 15:1-9. To paraphrase these verses, the Gospel is the death, burial, and Resurrection of Jesus Christ, all according to the Scriptures. It is through His sacrifice, death, shedding of blood, and Resurrection, that we now have life through Him, ministered to us by the Holy Ghost.

Salvation is a free gift offered by the grace of God, thus the name for this dispensation. Let’s consider what grace did. Starting on the Day of Pentecost, probably in the year 30 A.D., God unleashed a new force among mankind. These people were different. They had the resident gift of the Holy Ghost. Grace had touched their lives. What innocence and conscience and human government and promise and law had not done; grace did. The early church was composed of radically-transformed men and women. In one generation, this grace-filled group turned the world upside down. They produced the New Testament. They produced overcomers. In some respects, they were the early rain. They judged the Jewish world of the time and they changed the culture of the Roman Empire.

Grace made a difference. Grace supplied what was lacking in all the prior ages of man. Yet, I will show that even God’s grace was not sufficient to truly change mankind as a whole. The Gospel did not turn every evil-doer into a saint. It did not completely eliminate crime or wickedness. Grace is amazing in its effects on the individual, the family and the church. But it will not convert the world and transform our evil society into a truly-godly environment.

Every dispensation we have studied ultimately failed to bring universal peace, a just society, and the blessings of God on the cursed earth. In that respect, even the dispensation of grace will fail. Even the grace of God is not enough. People thought the church would convert the world and Christians would govern the world in true righteousness. The Imperial Church and the Dark Ages proved this wrong. The great emphasis on evangelism, while good and praiseworthy, will not result in converting the entire world.

Acts 17:30 says that it is God’s will that all people everywhere repent. But they won’t. Scriptures foretell a coming judgment that will rain down on sinners. It will be an awful time when God ends this dispensation in judgment. “And I will punish the world for their evil, and the wicked for their iniquity; and I will cause the arrogancy of the proud to cease, and will lay low the haughtiness of the terrible.” Isaiah 13:11. This judgment is merited because of the transgressions of mankind. “The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the Lord hath spoken this word. The earth mourneth and fadeth away, the world languisheth and fadeth away, the haughty people of the earth do languish. The earth also is defiled under the inhabitants thereof; because they have transgressed the laws, changed the ordinance, broken the everlasting covenant. Therefore hath the curse devoured the earth, and they that dwell therein are desolate: therefore the inhabitants of the earth are burned, and few men left.” Isaiah 24:3-6.

But every dispensation also ended with the hope for a better world. Even so, the age of grace leads directly to the return of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the establishment of a reign of universal peace, joy and life. The seventh dispensation, really the final dispensation, will bring in the eternal kingdom of God.

The Seventh Dispensation – The Millennial Kingdom

The sixth dispensation, the Age of Grace, was particularly relevant to us because we are living in it. This dispensation is not just history; it is now. But the next age, the last dispensation, can only be studied through prophecy. It is still future. It is called the Millennial Dispensation – the 1000-year reign of Christ on earth.

Now, the focus shifts from history, where God worked in the past; and beyond God’s present truth; to the grand and glorious future for all of creation. The next dispensation, the last dispensation, will finally produce what the others could not do. In many ways, this next one will be the greatest dispensation, but it is a dispensation; it is time-limited. I define a biblical dispensation as limited periods of time wherein God works with mankind in a particular way, and which always ends in a judgment and a hope for a better future. The Millennial Age fits this definition. It is a limited period of 1000 years. God will work with humanity in a true theocracy with Jesus and His bride ruling the earth. But this dispensation will also end in a great judgment – the Battle of Gog and Magog and the Great White Throne – yet will usher in a Utopian eternity.

The last dispensation occurs when the Son of God, Jesus the Messiah, the Prince of Peace, the Lion of the Tribe of Judah, returns to Earth. At that time He will rule from Jerusalem over Israel and all of the nations for one thousand years of peace. This millennium is succinctly described in Revelation 20:1-6. According to Jeremiah 3:17, Jerusalem will then be the throne of the Lord. Isaiah 2:2-4 promises that the law will go from Zion. And Isaiah 9:7 speaks of the increase of His government.

The next dispensation will be characterized by peace, joy, the lifting of the curse, the elimination of sickness and healing of all deformities, eternal life, a universally-prosperous economy, and the elimination of all crime and establishment of a just society. Again many scriptures could be cited – if space allowed.

It will take a full 1000 years, but the Lord will restore and re-make society and the environment. All the areas under the control of Christ and His Bride will be a paradise. But every dispensation ends in judgment. Even the 1000-year reign of Christ will end in a great judgment; not on the majority of the inhabitants, but on the resolute sinners.

There will be sinners throughout the thousand years, else the Scriptures about the sinner dying one hundred years old in the Kingdom would have no meaning: “the sinner being an hundred years old shall be accursed.” Isaiah 65:20. By the end of the 1000 years, there will still be areas of the earth that are not under Kingdom domination and control. Over the course of one thousand years, more and more nations will come under the reign of Christ, but some will never submit to that reign. There are millennial prophecies which state that there will no rainfall on those nations who refuse to worship the King in Jerusalem. Zechariah 14:16-17.

The Kingdom will have reached out to touch and cover most of the earth. However, there will be nations “in the four quarters of the earth” which have refused to submit to Christ. Other nations will only yield feigned obedience. See Psalms 66:3, center column reference. Those nations want to receive the kingdom blessings but will not fully submit to the rule and reign of Christ and His Bride.

“And when the thousand years are expired, Satan shall be loosed out of his prison, And shall go out to deceive the nations which are in the four quarters of the earth, Gog and Magog, to gather them together to battle: the number of whom is as the sand of the sea.” Revelation 20:7-8. This final battle is necessary to cleanse the earth of all remnants of evil. Those who never submitted, and those who only pretended to submit, will be deceived at the end of the thousand years. Satan is that great dragon which has “deceived the whole world” for six thousand years. Revelation 12:9. At the end of this one thousand year reign of Christ, the devil will again deceive the outcast and renegade nations. “Why do the heathen rage, and the people imagine a vain thing? The kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the LORD, and against his anointed, saying, Let us break their bands asunder, and cast away their cords from us.” Psalms 2:1-3.

For one thousand years, they have resisted Christ; they are ripe targets for the devil. They have stayed in the remote areas, refusing to submit to Jesus Christ and His benevolent government. The devil leads them in one more insurrection and rebellion. Just as men refused to repent during the terrible tribulation of the seven last plagues, Revelation 16:9, they will refuse to repent and accept Christ during His one thousand year reign. Local war lords and renegade nations and kingdoms will gather together to make one final attempt to overthrow Jesus Christ and His government. They must either destroy what Christ has done, or perish themselves.

The rebels will gather and march on Jerusalem one last time. “And they went up on the breadth of the earth, and compassed the camp of the saints about….” Revelation 20:9. The Middle East will once more be a battleground. This will be the devil’s final crusade. But the armies of the outcasts will be utterly defeated. “And they went up on the breadth of the earth, and compassed the camp of the saints about, and the beloved city: and fire came down from God out of heaven, and devoured them. And the devil that deceived them was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone, where the beast and the false prophet are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever.” Revelation 20:9-10. The devil is cast into the lake of fire. This lake of fire is the second death, from which there is no resurrection. Revelation 20:14.

“And I saw a great white throne, and him that sat on it, from whose face the earth and the heaven fled away; and there was found no place for them.” Revelation:20:11. The Great White Throne Judgment is the final judgment and ends the seventh dispensation. Everyone must give an account to God for the deeds done in this body. “And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne; and books were opened; and another book was opened, which is the book of life; and the dead were judged out of the things which were written in the books, according to their works. And the sea gave up the dead that were in it; and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them; and they were judged every one according to their works.” Revelation 20:12-13.

The effect of the Battle of Gog and Magog, and the Great White Throne Judgment, and the second death, is to fully and ultimately eradicate all evil from the face of the earth. “What do ye imagine against the Lord? he will make an utter end: affliction shall not rise up the second time.” Nahum 1:9. Affliction, or evil, will never rise again throughout creation. “For the earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons of God. For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who hath subjected the same in hope, Because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now. And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.” Romans 8:19-23.

Even so, come quickly Lord Jesus.

Is this an apt description of our society? Our nation is bankrupt – economically and morally. Our government has amassed a debt load that is unthinkable. It is now more than $13 billion; about $43,000 per person. It will be a terrible legacy for our children and grandchildren. We have a President who denies the Christian history of our nation, and has publicly declared that American is not a Christian nation. Our society has embraced homosexuality not only as something to be tolerated, but to be acceptable and accepted. Every society that has ever embraced homosexuality has suffered terrible judgment. Our nation’s educational philosophy is now one based on situational ethics and secular humanism. Sin is no longer shameful.

Sadly, our society is corrupting America’s churches. An overwhelming body of research by the Barna group and others has demonstrated that evangelical Christians no longer display a transformed lifestyle. It is getting hard to distinguish Born-again Christians from the rest of society. The divorce rate is the same, as is the prevalence of drinking, sex without marriage and venues of entertainment. So-called Christians in America dress like, talk like and act like their unsaved neighbors.

We aren’t shocked by this phenomenon. The scriptures said it was coming. But it shouldn’t be this way in the body of Christ. In the midst of corrupting culture, we must remain true to our biblical culture. That is why verse 14 of II Timothy 3 says to continue in the things we have learned. As the world gets darker around us, our light should stand out more. “That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world.” Philippians 2:15.

Light is different from darkness. We cannot be lights if we blend into the darkness of our world. Biblical holiness has meant separation from the world. If we let the attitudes of the world infiltrate the church, we will lose our calling.

The August 11 issue of USA Today reported that teens are getting less involved in church groups. Only one in four teens now participate in church youth groups. Prayer, Bible reading and church attendance are falling. They don’t see the church as relevant. Other Barna research found that over 70% of evangelical Christian youth walk away from church by age 21. Let’s make sure it doesn’t happen in the body of Christ. While only God can give young people a revelation of our calling and purpose, we can do everything we can to explain why we are a separate people. We are not like everyone else, because God has asked us not to be like everyone else.

That is the way of the “Christian” Evangelical world. It should not be that way in the body of Christ. As the Apostle Paul taught us, we are not to be conformed to this world, but we are to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. Romans 12:2. We are to shine out of darkness as the radically-transformed disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ.

The true church is a counter-culture church. It is unique and distinct from other religious endeavors. It stands out, because its members are different – gloriously different – from the rest of our society. In these “perilous times,” let’s refuse to compromise with worldly attitudes and ways. Let’s continue to swim against the currents, and promote a radical concept of holiness and righteousness for all the world to see.

All Christians pray. It is a central act of faith. We pray for God’s blessings on our family and friends, for our pastor and church, for the sick, for protection, for so many things. Sometimes, we petition for our own needs; and sometimes for the needs of others. But if you are having some difficult times in your marriage, have you made that situation a matter of prayer? Prayer changes things. Prayer makes a difference in every area of our lives. Have you prayed, really prayed, about your marriage? Jesus taught His disciples to pray. Paul said to pray without ceasing. Prayer should come as naturally to a Christian as breathing or eating does.

Not all prayer is intercession, petitioning God to grant specific requests. Prayer is also praise, communion, thanksgiving, communication, submission, and rejuvenation. Prayer connects us to God. Prayer is one of the tools to strengthen the inner man. It fortifies the soul for spiritual warfare. It builds spiritual reserves for arduous tasks. The Christian who fails to pray fails to grow.

How does prayer relate to Christian marriage? If we pray, will God make our marriage better? Or, if we make our marriage better, will God draw closer to us in prayer? It could be both. There is not a situation in life that cannot be made better by drawing closer to God in prayer. Your job can be better if you are closer to God. Your personal life will be better if you are more prayerful. And God can make wonders happen in your marriage if you pray more.

Don’t just constantly ask Him to make your spouse better. Ask for wisdom to be able to be better yourself. Don’t ask him to change your spouse’s attitude, ask Him to give you grace to improve your own attitude. Your changes in your heart may be the catalyst that will eventually spur your spouse to improve. That would be a wise thing to do. Just realize your spouse may wait to see if your changes are real. It will take both patience and wisdom. The Bible tells us in James 1:5, you can ask God for wisdom. Solomon did. Jesus said in Luke 21:19, “In your patience possess ye your souls.“

Many times in the Psalms we read of the prayers directed to God seeking help in times of trouble. The name of the Lord is a strong tower in our troubled times. Perhaps prayer will help you to better accept your difficult times, perhaps it will even result in the removal of some of the problems such as illness, financial hardships, etc, that have added to the turmoil of marriage. Try prayer. It just might work.

Wife, you don’t know what good you might do if you stop in the middle of a stressful situation and ask your husband to pray for you. It is hard for a man to be upset with someone that he is praying for. Maybe both of you should drop down side-by-side on your knees and spend some quality time talking to the Lord. What have you got to lose? What have you the potential to gain?

But that is not the thrust of my point here. There is a spiritual connection, almost a godly mystical connection, between a good marriage and prayer. I believe prayer and marriage are related in an entirely different way than most people think. The seminal verse on that point is found in Peter’s writings: “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” I Peter 3:7. Consider carefully what the apostle is saying. Husband, love your wife; give her honor – that your prayers be not hindered.

Peter is connecting the central Christian act of praying to your Heavenly Father to a husband’s attitude towards his wife. He is saying you can pray all you want to, but those prayers will not be effective if your attitude toward your spouse is wrong. God sees you, not as an individual praying, but as a married person. He factors in how you treat your spouse in His response to your prayers. Think about that for a moment.

I am sure the Lord considers the way a wife treats her husband when He is responding to her prayers, too. According to our Master’s teachings in Mark 10:8, a husband and wife are not two married persons, but one flesh. God does not see them as two separate people anymore; He sees them as one. You cannot be divided and be heard.

A lot of people say that if you want a stronger marriage, you should develop a stronger prayer life. And there is some truth in that. But maybe we have it backwards. Does God’s Word tell us that if we want a stronger prayer life, we need a stronger marriage? I believe that is the whole point of I Peter 3:7.

You see, no one is truly spiritual if they are married and aren’t building a strong, Christian marriage. Married saints, your first and most important ministry is to minister to your spouse. Prayer and marriage are also mentioned together in I Corinthians 7. Verse 5 speaks of sex. In verses 2-4, Paul was encouraging married couples to have physical relations. Then in verse 5 he says you may want to abstain for a limited time for a period of concentrated prayer and fasting. But come together in conjugal relations again. My point in referring to this scripture is to show that a good marriage and prayer go together.

If there is discord in the home, you cannot have a good relationship with God. Really, if there is something in your heart against any brother or sister in the Lord, your prayer to God will not be accepted. Jesus said so in Matthew 5:23-24. If you have ought in your heart against your brother, leave your gift at the altar and go and first be reconciled to your brother, before God will accept your gift. That principle applies in the home as well. In Mark 11:25-26, Jesus said if you stand to pray and have something in your heart against anyone, you must forgive. The implication is that God won’t hear your prayer if your interpersonal relationships are not right. Your prayers will be hindered.

In listing the things that God considers hateful, and that are an abomination to Him, Proverbs 6:19 includes the person who sows discord. Our Heavenly Father despises discord in His creation. The two places where the Lord should never find discord is in the church and in the Christian home. God hates discord in the home.

So wives, treat your husband as a gift from God – he is. Husbands, treat your wife as if she were extremely valuable – she is. You may find that more of your prayers are answered if you do right in your own home.

Every day of marriage is not sweet. No man and woman meet, fall in love, and live happily ever after. If that is what you are expecting, then you are destined for disappointment and frustration. Some days are hard. Some periods of the marriage are not deliriously happy. Yes, marriage is the gift of God, but we are fallen humans. We cannot realistically expect every day to be giddy, wedded bliss.

Just because God gave us marriage before the Fall of man, don’t get caught up in the conscious or unconscious notion that the institution is going to connect you to paradise. The Fall affected everything on earth, including marriage. Our world is profoundly broken because of the curse; our lives are tragically scarred by sin. The problem is that we have been led to expect marriage to be paradise; but sin and the curse prevent that from happening. Marriage might be the primary institution affected by the Fall. Romance novels and movies and societal expectations have given us an unrealistic view of what marriage ought to be. And it isn’t that wonderful every single day. But if we implement the Word of God, our marriages can become almost idyllic.

Yes, Christian marriages can be better. And marriages in the body of Christ should be better than any marriages anywhere. The truth has profound effects in every area of our lives. As a people blessed with truth, and one constantly seeking to implement truth to overcome sin we should receive the concomitant benefits of a blessed family. Question: does your spouse see Jesus in you? Is there even a faint resemblance? Is your spouse married to someone who is becoming more like the Lord all the time? We in this fellowship are dedicated to healing the marred image of God. Can your spouse see progress in your development to be more like Christ?

Marriage is of God, it is designed to display the love God has for His people. There are certain aspects, attributes and hallmarks of holiness that should be seen in every Christian marriage. In this and subsequent articles, we will look at those attributes. These will not be presented in a particular order, and all are important ingredients for a successful marriage. If any of them are absent in your relationship with your spouse, or the way you relate to any other person, then I suggest you begin working on incorporating these into the relationship.

The subject here is respect. In the prior article, we saw that love is a decision and not an emotion. Here we present the fact that you cannot love someone you don’t respect. You have to respect your spouse in order to love him or her. Ephesians 5:33 teaches that the wife must respect her husband. And I Peter 3:7 establishes that the husband must respect his wife. Far too many couples do not honor each other. We are so busy demanding the other party show us some respect that we overlook our own lack of respect for them. We should give respect and honor to everyone. I Peter 2:17. “Everyone” includes the person you married.

Both men and women are of equal value. Neither sex is better than or superior to the other. They have different roles; but equal worth. Male and female were both made in the likeness of God. Genesis 1:27. The Apostle Paul said in Galatians 3:28 that in Christ, there is no male or female. Jesus was born into and launched His church in a society that did not respect women. They had no voice in political assemblies. Their testimony was of little value in courts. In most of the world, they could not own or inherit property in their own name. They were forbidden to receive any formal education. Jewish men of that era were known to sometimes thank God that they had not been born a Gentile, or a woman.

How did Jesus respond to society’s assigned role for women? John 4:27 is a verse in the description of Jesus talking to a Samaritan woman at the well. The disciples were amazed. The Greek is “thaumazo” – a sense of incredulity. The followers of Jesus were essentially saying, “I can’t believe this is happening.” They were not just amazed that He talked with a Samaritan, but a woman. Certainly no Jewish rabbi would speak privately with a woman – and especially would not talk theology with her. But Jesus did. He included women as His associates and supporters. Women travelled with Him and His disciples. See Luke 8:1-3. But there was never any hint of scandal, because Jesus respected these women. The New Testament church made more room for women than any society in existence at the time. That was because the church had a respect for their worth.

Husband, do you respect your wife? Do you value her worth? She is very different from you. You know her faults. Do you still respect her? Do you acknowledge her worth to God? You and she have different roles, to be sure, but do you recognize that morally she is your equal? The Apostle Paul knew the faults of the Corinthian church. They were divided; they were suing one another at law; there was fornication in the church; they were getting drunk at communion, and other detestable faults. Paul knew them all. But notice what he said to them in I Corinthians 1:4: he was thankful for God working in them. Are you thankful to God for the wife He has given you?

Wives, what answers would you give to the above questions, if asked about your husband? Do you really thank God for the man who married you? Both of you, when is the last time either of you thanked your spouse for anything? Are you nicer to the waitress at the restaurant than you are to the person you married? Is there any genuine appreciation for all the work and labor your spouse contributes? Are you too busy complaining about all that you do, to recognize what the other party is doing too?

Be careful. Everyone craves the respect of others, especially those who are close to us. But when our spouse does not respect us we frequently start down a dark road. Instead of changing to earn their respect; we start attacking our spouse’s self-worth, trying to prove to ourselves that it doesn’t matter that they don’t respect us. If we can convince ourselves of our spouse’s bad character, then their lack of respect isn’t so painful.
But this is wrong. We need their respect and should work to earn it. One way to earn their respect is to respect them first. Treat your husband or wife with honor and dignity. Do not bad-mouth or demean them – even if they are doing that to you. I never yelled back at my father, even when he was yelling at me. Why? Because I respected him too much. At age 16 or 17, I wasn’t afraid of him; but I respected him. It should be that way in every marriage. Respect your spouse enough not to respond to their provocations. Do not belittle them – publicly or privately. You should even be careful with your jokes. Sometimes what we say in jest comes with a hard edge.

Good marriages are seen in the respect the husband and wife have for each other. Arguments, bickering, and hatred can only manifest once you have lost your respect for the person you married. You certainly respected them on your wedding day, but for some, familiarity breeds contempt. What happened to that respect?

Remember, respect can only be earned, never demanded. You cannot force someone to respect you, least of all the person who knows you best. So many marriages reach rocky times because the parties forfeit the respect of the other. They find the faults of the other, they learn who that person really is and they lose their respect for them.

Respect is earned through good character. For us, good character is a life that brings glory to God. This Christian lifestyle is described in Galatians 5:13-26. That Christian lifestyle is seen in loving your neighbor, walking in the Spirit, putting off the works of the flesh and manifesting the fruit of the Spirit. Good character means living a Christ-like life.

The Apostle Paul said in Ephesians 4::1-3: “I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” We are called to be a Christian. That calling is not suspended in your own home. It applies to your relationship with everyone, including your spouse – especially your spouse. Respect that person enough to act like a Christian towards him or her.

Colossians 3:1-19 is too long to be quoted here, but these verses must be lived, and not just read. We are to seek those things which are above, desiring to be like our Lord. We are told to mortify the deeds of the flesh – those fleshy appetites listed in verses 5-7. We are commanded to rule the baser passions listed in verses 8-9. And we are to put on the new attitudes of the new man in verses 10-16.

Good character is godly. You should be just as good a Christian to your own family in the home as you are to the world at large. There should be no appreciable difference between your public and your private persona. Don’t be an angel to your friends and co-workers, and a terrorist to your family. Jesus said in Matthew 5:16, let your light shine. He meant for it to also shine in the eyes of your spouse.